Parenting

"What's my child doing in the beginner's area!"  This was asked by the mom of the little girl I was instructing on how to ski.  "She's better than that!  She should be up on the mountain skiing more difficult trails!"  Hannah was a delightful 11-year old, and yes, she was easily capable of skiing more difficult trails.  However the other kids assigned to my lesson, Alex and Seamus, were not ready to go beyond the beginner area...at least not yet.  I was playing the hand I was dealt the best way I knew how.  I needed to try and get the boys' skill level up before taking them up on the mountain.

I've been lucky so far this year.  This was my first (probably won't be my last) upset parent.  I've seen other instructors have to deal with this sort of situation.  More often than not it is a mom who voices displeasure, however there have been a few dads and even the occasional grandparent.  In each case it has been associated with not pushing their kid more.  Sad.

I probably challenge the kids I teach more than most of the instructors, but I do so only after I've won their trust and have a good grasp of their ability.  Push a kid too far and they'll withdraw and shutdown on you.  Loose their trust and you might as well give up.  Hannah was doing just fine in the beginner area working on her turns while I was trying to get Alex to simply make one.  The only one upset was her mom, so I shrugged it off and focused on who was really important...the kids.

Before lunchtime we were up on the mountain skiing.  Admittedly we were only skiing the easiest slopes, but all of them were gaining confidence and showing progress.  After lunch we tried a more difficult trail.  As expected Alex struggled, but by now Seamus was helping him and both boys were intent on not being shown up by Hannah.  More importantly, I had their trust.  Hannah was making some very nice smooth parallel turns.  She was relaxed and enjoying herself.

At the end of the day Hannah's dad came to pick her up.  There was no sign of mom.  Her dad asked a few questions about why she was placed in with a group that was below her ability.  The ski school director explained that he felt it was the best option available.  He could have placed her in with a more advanced group but was concerned she would have ended up in the back and probably not received as much attention.  Her dad seemed unconvinced.

I watched Hannah while all this was being discussed and she seemed nonplused.  Obviously she's heard it all before.  She seemed to shrug it off.  I listened as she walked out of the room with her dad and heard her ask, "Can we go take a run?  I want to show you what I learned." 

Go show 'em all Hannah.